The day is here. It has been five years since my cancer diagnosis. A lot has changed in that five years. The baby that I was pregnant with at the time is now, almost a five-year old. I made it through surgery and chemo. My hair came back! I was diagnosed with cancer again only to find out I was ovulating at the time of my scan. After my misdiagnosis I have a wonderful new Doctor and facility that I go to for my follow-up appointments 🙂 We moved three times (seriously done with moving.) We lost our dear Percy bear and welcomed our Miss Amber. So many things have changed since September 28, 2012.
There are also a lot of things that haven’t changed since that day. The fear and anxiety I have about testing and scans doesn’t waiver over time. Any lump, bump or out of the ordinary feeling I have sends me into complete panic. I still feel sadness about my diagnosis. It feels very unfair that at 30 years old I was unable to have any more children. Yes, I am so incredibly grateful for the ones I did have but to have the decision-making over your body taken away from you is hard. I also still feel the love I felt that day. It still amazes me how many people reached out to help us during that time and still to this day.
I feel like I am more knowledgeable about the cancer world. I still do my research about cervical cancer and all cancers. Seriously, knowledge is power and a wonderful tool to have. I am not afraid to speak up for myself about my own treatment or to seek second opinions. If you or someone you know has cancer (or really any type of disease) and they feel like they are not being cared for properly it is okay to look at other options. If you have to travel then travel. If you have to inevitably switch Doctors then switch. A person’s health is way more important than anything else.
Five years later I have found writing as a great outlet. This blog is a huge part of my life now. I don’t always have the time to commit to it but I am working on that 😉 I have also invested in my health. It’s been quite the journey with just starting to doing 5k’s to being sidelined by lymphedema. Since my lymphedema came about I have found yoga and some other exercises that I am able to do when walking/jogging isn’t an option. Not only do I feel physically stronger I also feel mentally stronger. There are very hard days still but cancer taught me to be tough. I am also so incredibly grateful for this life I was given. Every day I find something amazing. Whether it’s a beautiful sunrise, a new skill that Avery learns or someone else doing the laundry. (The last one doesn’t happen much but it’s super amazing when it does.) Seriously, though there are so many things to be grateful and excited for every single day.
Five years later I am still here and there is so much more that I want to do.